Hosting… it's an art really. Some of us are a super breed of hosts and some really suck at it. I love my mom but I don’t really associate her with attributing my greater qualities. Although if there is one thing I HAVE learned from her; it's being a good hostess. I love to plan and execute a good get together. Growing up and even today my mother is the queen of hosting she has a get together/dinner party at least 3 out of 7 days a week if not MORE! And has opened her home to/hosted dozens of exchnage students from all over the world. She loves having company whether it be briefly or for an extended time. Once you walk into her home you are welcomed, comfortable and served as well as entertained you also feel comfortable because you are not treated as a “viewer”. There is an alternative breed of host and it’s not that they intentionally mean to alienate or make you uncomfortable but they just don’t have any natural hosting abilities. I comprised the tools I think it takes to host a successful party and earn the title of top notch host/hostess.
INVITATIONS AND PLANNING: Always plan ahead, when hosting a get together big or small DO NOT procrastinate, even a small get together should have some sort of grace period for people with busy schedules otherwise you may come off as rude. I have devised a list of appropriate time frames …
3-4 weeks or more for a large event (fundraisers, showers, etc…);
2-3 weeks for a medium size event (birthdays, baptismal receptions , dinner parties); and,
1 ½ - 2 weeks for small gatherings one week is never appropriate! (small groups, seasonal meet and greets, holiday parties etc.)
A text or email is never an appropriate form of invitation. Whatever the occasion create a solid invitation if it is extremely informal or a monthly occurrence make sure to communicate your plans to each individual by phone if anything remember (the more personal the more inviting) Then a reminder by text is welcome because it really lets a person know they are wanted. Be prepared Nothing sucks more than showing up to a gathering where you feel anxious and uncomfortable because things are not prepared when you arrive. Be ready for early arrivers don’t immediately put them to work or rush around them as if they are not there. (this leaves a bad taste in the mouth of a “Guest”) Instead clean the day before to ensure a smooth set up on the day of the event. And make sure you have everything taken care of before hand so when it is time to party there are no worries (people can sense distress.)
GROUPING: If you are hosting a short gathering for a special occasion it is okay to invite a variety of people. Guest will not worry about the people they are mixing with for 2-3 hours. But if you are planning a more intimate gathering or planning to spend an extended period of time together remember to choose people who will have common interests. Make sensible judgment.
LIVELINESS or being "THE HOSTESS WITH THE MOSTESS”: The key to being a good hostess is making each and every person feel like they had a special time and paying attention to everyone without alienating. This can seem like a daunting task but its quit easy once you have had ample practice. The key is to mingle not dwindle always seem interested and greet every person. When conversing in a group and you spot a person being left out politely engage them in the conversation for an opening to join. When someone is talking do not steal the spotlight. For example if the topic were to arise such as… “The upcoming election" don’t interrupt by saying “Don’t even get me started on that” it’s considered an interruption and deemed quite rude. Also don’t steal the spotlight. Let everyone have their opinion if it becomes an issue casually change the subject. Our moods, emotions and actions influence the people around us. Even if you are not having a good day or week please place that to the side because it WILL make people uncomfortable you must always be an enthusiastic host. (even if they are you BEST FRIEND refrain from bringing it up during a get together its not the place.)
NEAT AND CLEAN: this perhaps is the most important… some people just don’t get it. I was taught to never invite a guest into a dirty home!!!!! Saying you are to busy is never an excuse. If you don’t have time, don’t have company. From 1 guest to 25 guests your home MUST always be NEAT and CLEAN. Clear clutter and Clean messes!!!!
FOOD: When preparing food for your guest there are a few simple rules to follow. Don’t experiment your guest are not lab rats. Please do not ever experiment on the day of get-together. You really want the food to be tasty memorable (in a good way). If you experiment and you get it wrong, you will give a very bad impression about your self to that guest. Prepare fresh food. Remember if you make 9 great dishes and one is yuck! Then the yuck one is going to leave the BIGGEST impression. Its better to have 5 average dishes than 9 good ones and 2 yucky ones.
THE FAREWELL: Please be a gracious host. Even though your tired or have plans after the gathering please remember that everyone took time out of their bust schedule to attend your party BE POLITE stick around till the last person leaves give a gracious send off and a kind “thank you for coming”, “were so glad you could make it”, or “we really enjoyed your company” I mean really its not hard! Please don’t send someone off with a “see ya” from the couch or leave your other guest to send them off while you disappear to get ready for other plans.
Remember being a host is a responsibly but also FUN if you can’t handle all of the things that are involved its better to bow out and let someone with more experience host.
